Ep 112: F The Shoulds. Do The Wants with Tricia Huffman
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Ep 112: F The Shoulds. Do The Wants with Tricia Huffman
Episode 112: Show Notes
The term ‘should’ may seem innocuous, but its outsized role in our vocabulary and society has had a profound effect on how we perceive the world and our place in it. Our guest today is a firm believer that eliminating the word ‘should’ from your vocabulary is the first step in developing a mindfulness practice that will help you establish decision-making practices that are aligned with your wants, values, and needs.
Tricia Huffman is a self-described joyologist, speaker, and author of the book F the Shoulds. Do the Wants: Get Clear on Who You Are, What You Want, and Why You Want It. In our conversation, Tricia shares what she has learned from working with stars like Dolly Parton and Jason Mraz on tour, and what her work has taught her about fear, happiness, and success.
We also talk about how the sudden death of her father triggered a massive career shift, and how she finally gave herself permission to write her book after 12 years of living a life without the word ‘should’.
We loved having Tricia on the show and we’re sure you’ll find our conversation every bit as enlightening and inspiring as we did. Tune in for profound insights from our guest and plenty of practical examples on how to stop using the word ‘should’ and instead make decisions based on what you truly value!
Key Points From This Episode:
Introducing today’s guest, author, speaker, and joyologist, Tricia Huffman.
Tricia’s love for music and her first career as a sound engineer.
How Tricia’s experiences as an adolescent prompted her to question the status quo.
Tricia’s fibromyalgia diagnosis as a teenager and how her pain isolated her.
The quote by Eleanor Roosevelt that changed Tricia’s life.
What working for an icon like Dolly Parton taught Tricia about fear and self-doubt.
The sudden death of Tricia’s father and the impact it had on her life.
Why Tricia got rid of most of her possessions and how it shaped her nomadic lifestyle.
The process that Tricia went through to give up the word ‘should’.
How Tricia came to call herself a Joyologist.
Tricia’s work as a mindset specialist working with those in the public eye.
Why Jason Mraz called Tricia his Manager of Integrity.
How Tricia created a paid position for herself with touring musicians.
How avoiding the word ‘should’ has helped Tricia develop a mindfulness practice around being aware of what she truly wants and needs in any situation.
Examples of how to reframe ‘shoulds’ in your everyday life.
How Tricia wrote her book and what she learned from the experience.
How to follow Tricia and what she has planned for the future.
Tweetables:
“It was just trying to ask myself, ‘if nobody else cared, if nobody else mattered, what would you be doing?’. I just realized how much I was unconsciously defaulting to everyone else.” — Tricia Huffman [0:14:54]
“This quote from Eleanor Roosevelt, which is, ‘no one can make you feel inferior without your consent’. That was such a game-changer to me when I discovered it back then because I was really being met with a lot of external judgment. Not just this fear of being judged.” — Tricia Huffman [0:16:34]
“When I can look at my fears and then question them and just be like, ‘Yeah, that's a valid fear. You're working for an icon. It's a valid fear. And what are you going to do to support yourself through it?’ Instead, I was just trying to ignore the fears.” — Tricia Huffman [0:22:45]
“Working in that industry really showed me the humanness that we all struggle with and that once you get everything, that doesn't mean everything's easy-peasy.” — Tricia Huffman [0:29:47]
“Naming the worries, the fears, the shame, the guilt, the blame, all of that is actually, for me, the most healing thing that has given me the power to continue to show up for my life and do what I want to do.” — Tricia Huffman [01:05:20]
“It's not like living your dream life, it's like you're living an aligned and alive life. Because you are constantly aware of what you're doing and why.” — Tricia Huffman [01:15:28]
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
F the Shoulds. Do the Wants: Get Clear on Who You Are, What You Want, and Why You Want It